Everything Becomes F: The Perfect Insider
Chapter One White Meeting
2015, summer.
2015 Summer
I offer this diary to you.
To tell you
what she was thinking,
and what her fate was.
She was always thinking...
About who she was,
where she'd come from,
and where she was going.
Everyone convinces themselves that life is an enjoyable thing.
She, however,
was always thinking about how much of a burden it was.
And about how much of our freedom
was lost by the conviction that
we had to stay alive.
Miss, it's about time to leave.
I know, Suwano.
Okay, bye!
Goodbye, miss.
Good morning, Saikawa-sensei.
Morning, Nishinosono-kun.
You seem tired, Sensei.
How can you tell?
That's easy.
When you're feeling good, you put coffee on first thing, right?
The only time you drink soda from the can
is when you're tired and don't want to do anything.
I see. You're a careful observer.
It's an elephant today, huh?
Where do you get those T-shirts?
Just tell me already!
Nishinosono-kun, let me give you some life advice.
Yes?
Never tell others what you're really thinking.
So there was a committee meeting, huh?
You're sharp.
Naturally, what was supposed to be a one-hour meeting took three hours,
as I expected.
Because so many people are stupid.
No, because enough aren't stupid.
These are all people who don't want to be thought of as stupid.
Isn't that because they are stupid?
Well, I guess you could say that.
You're feeling a little better now, aren't you?
I'm forcing myself to feel better.
Oh, you're lying to me, aren't you?
In life, there are three great questions.
Who am I? Where do I come from?
Where am I going?
That's all I want to think about.
Honestly, thought is the one thing that is truly free.
However,
at some point, this strange power started controlling me,
and it began to be more complicated and less free.
When I was a kid, I'm sure I was able to think more freely about many things.
I guess humans
are programmed to get stupider as they age.
You're not stupid.
But I am getting older.
Just like the way your hair gets longer.
Oh, do you like it longer?
No comment.
Sensei, it's fine to talk about complicated stuff,
but you should take me somewhere once in a while!
Somewhere?
There's a new cake roll place in front of Kakuouzan Station...
They say the cakes are really soft and delicious!
When do you want to go?
I'm bad with promises.
Why?
Whenever I get up in the morning,
I always think to myself,
"Am I really the same person I was yesterday?"
You are to me.
For example,
just as a computer loads its OS into memory, and boots up each time it restarts,
is it possible I'm just booting up the person called "Saikawa Sohei" each morning,
and trying to play that role?
So? In other words, you won't take me on a date?
We were talking about a date?
Jeez!
You're an expert at changing the subject, aren't you?
Excuse me, Saikawa-sensei...
Oh, Nishinosono-san, you're here again?
Hi.
What is it, Hamanaka-kun?
My computer's acting weird.
Can you take a look at it?
Kunieda-kun isn't there?
It looks like it's kind of a bad time right now...
I understand.
In her case, it's probably difficult to find a good time.
I know, right?
Hold on a second, Nishinosono-kun.
Sure.
Oh, so, Sensei...
Where are we going for our seminar trip this year?
This year, I'm in charge of it.
What is your name?
Nishinosono.
I know your last name.
What is your name?
Moe.
Written with the kanji for "growing grass" and "colorful paints."
How old are you?
Almost twenty.
Um... Dr. Magata?
You knew my father, right—
What is 165 multiplied by 3,367?
555,555...
It appears you're bad at multiplying sevens.
That's not true.
I like the number seven.
Seven is a special number, isn't it?
It's the only lonely number.
What do you mean?
Try dividing the numbers one through ten into two groups.
And then multiply all of the numbers within each group.
Is it possible for the resulting sums to be equal?
No.
One of the groups contains a seven,
so the sum will be a multiple of seven.
But there's no seven in the other. So they can't be equal.
See? Seven is the only lonely number, isn't it?
B and D are the same way.
Is it true that you killed your parents?
Your brain works fast.
And you're decisive.
He told you to meet with me, right?
"He"?
Saikawa-sensei.
No... I came here on my own.
I came because I'm interested in you.
I lied about wanting to hear about my father.
You are a very honest girl, aren't you?
You were raised in a wealthy family.
Was your father very strict?
And... Hmm...
You are attracted to Saikawa-sensei, aren't you?
Saikawa-sensei was my father's last student.
A brilliant man, with a very innovative method of thinking.
He is worthy of respect—
That is not an answer.
The answer is yes.
Sohei-kun?
Oh, sorry.
Are you a student?
Yes, Saikawa-sensei will be back soon.
Oh.
Then could you give this to him?
Um, who are you?
Are you Nishinosono-san?
I am Nishinosono, but...
Excuse me, who are you?
I'm...
Gido Setsuko!
Gido-san?
Is there a problem?
You should grow out your hair.
It'd look good on you...
So you're Nishinosono-san, huh?
Uh, how do you know me?
Because all Sohei-kun
ever talks about is you.
Um, how are you and he connected—
Sorry.
I've got a taxi outside.
Tell Sohei-kun I said, "Hi."
Ciao!
Sorry, Nishinosono-kun.
Not at all.
Is something wrong?
No, nothing.
You had a visitor just now.
Who?
Someone named Gido-san.
She left immediately.
And she said to give you this.
All right. Thanks.
You're mad, aren't you?
Not at all.
You can eat one of those.
I know that.
This is horrible...
Nishinosono-kun, you know this, right?
There are three things in this world that I simply cannot eat.
Red bean jam, roasted soy flour—
Watermelon.
She's just screwing with me.
This is infuriating.
Nishinosono-kun, want to do some coloring books?
Coloring books?
That was a joke.
Luxury means something with no meaning at all.
You're still angry, aren't you?
But those feelings are
an uncertain thing, like a crystal on the verge of collapse.
Sure, just sit there, sounding cool, Sensei.
You had something you wanted to say to me, right?
No...
I mean, I do!
What is it? Go ahead.
I...
went to Magata Labs.
And? Were you able to meet Dr. Magata Shiki?
What's wrong?
The tone of your voice just went up.
You're imagining it...
She knew you.
She's read your papers, it seems.
Really?
Don't just show your teeth like that!
No, I mean...
Excuse me.
I'm sorry! Right now, I'm—
Sorry.
Like we thought, the problem with the computer was a virus.
Thanks.
How's your seminar going?
Terribly.
They still aren't using their brains.
Romance is the only thing on their minds.
I'm hungry.
I'll treat you somewhere, Nishinosono-kun.
Why not go with him?
Right!
What does Gido-san do?
Sensei?
I'm sorry. Hold on a second...
You're as terrible at that as ever.
Thanks.
She's an interesting girl, isn't she?
"I don't want to talk about something so stupid."
That's what you're thinking, isn't it?
You are sharp.
Dr. Magata was really pretty.
I heard she was twenty-nine,
but she looked a lot younger.
She was wearing all white, even her gloves.
And it was like...
She was like an angel that didn't belong in this world.
But sometimes, she looked like a devil.
Well, we were only able to talk via video chat.
I heard her new interview with Times magazine was the same way.
You know all about her, huh?
For the past three years,
she's started appearing in the public eye.
But...
Why would she meet someone like me?
I was sure she'd refuse.
She got stupid, too...
Stupid enough to finally take an interest in others.
In her interview, she said the same thing.
"Every human starts as a genius.
And as they age, they become average.
It's because they get stupid that they can work.
They can make small talk."
That sounds like something you'd say.
Oh, what a coincidence!
Am I interrupting?
Not at all.
Sorry!
Saikawa-sensei,
about this year's seminar trip...
We need to decide where we're goi—
Hamanaka-kun...
Nishinosono-kun said she met with Dr. Magata.
Dr. Magata?
The genius programmer?
How did you pull that off?
I asked my aunt.
Your aunt is, uh...
The wife of the governor of Aichi Prefecture.
Then your dad used to be
the president of our college?!
And she's his little sister.
Wow.
Dr. Magata earned her doctorate in her teens, right?
When she was eleven, to be precise.
At age twelve, she began to work as an engineer.
And her name's still known in a variety of fields.
The only person I know
who can legitimately be called a genius is Dr. Magata.
But she's a criminal, right?
A long time ago, she—
Fifteen years ago, Magata Shiki
killed her parents, who also held doctorates.
I asked about that, too.
What did she say?
That a doll killed them.
A doll did it.
I saw it happen.
A doll committed the murders?
I am aware, of course, that no one believes this.
But the truth exists,
regardless of others' understanding of it.
And she said
that doll disappeared somewhere...
After the incident,
Magata Shiki was declared non compos mentis,
and therefore not guilty.
And afterward, she vanished.
But in fact,
she'd gone to a lab on Himaka Island, in Mikawa Bay.
This whole time, she's been conducting her research there.
Then the rumor was true?
I see... You were able to meet her?
I wish I could, at least, send her an e-mail.
Would you feel the same way
if she were a man, Sensei?
That's a stupid question, Nishinosono-kun.
I don't know how many scientists there are in the world right now,
but I don't think any of them wouldn't want to meet Dr. Magata.
Even you, known as "the hope of academia,"
who's received every award he possibly could?
Of course.
Everything I've done in my life
wouldn't amount to the toenail on her little toe.
Do you want to meet her?
Yes.
Why?
If I met her, I might be able to escape.
From where?
From this world.
So let's go to Himaka Island!
The seminar trip.
Let's all go.
There's a campground on that island!
I've never been camping!
Then it's settled!
Don't just decide it like that.
I'm in charge!
And I'll talk to my aunt,
so I can see Dr. Magata again!
Alone.
Well? You're jealous, aren't you?
She'll be right there, but you won't be able to see her.
I'll go with you.
Why?
I don't want anything to happen to you.
That isn't what you're thinking at all!
What do you think, Kunieda-kun?
It's settled.
1991, winter...
Since her parents were busy,
she was sent to me far more often.
She was always thinking...
"What is life?
It was always flashing.
Flashing between life and death.
What happens to a person after death?
Does everything disappear?
Do you really think so?"
When she asked me that,
she was five.
She was always thinking...
About who she was,
where she'd come from,
and where she was going.
There was just one point in the conversation
when Dr. Magata seemed thrown off.
Dr. Magata,
what was your motive for killing your parents?
That is a stupid question.
Do you really think there is any meaning in something like a motive?
Did you come here to ask a thing like that?
We're out of time.
What is your last question?
Who are you?